Luscious, sparkling blood
by IertjeAshFan
Summary: Bella and Edward have been together for years. When Edward leaves for the day Bella discovers new feelings. What will Bella decide to do? Stay with Edward, or leave to share a whole other kind of love..?
1. Chapter 1

Luscious, sparkling blood

"Hey, Bella!" Alice opens the door and hugs me tightly.

"I bet you saw me coming, didn't you?" I chuckle. Alice looks at me all happy and then pulls me inside. "Of course I saw you coming. That's what I do." We both chuckle and walk through the house, straight to the kitchen where the rest of the family is waiting for us.

"Bella. How lovely to see you again!" Esme smiles while hugging me tightly. "Alice told us you were on your way, so we prepared you something to eat. Lunch?" I feel my face turn all red and smile at Alice. "Yes, thank you, Esme." I sit down at the breakfast bar and look at Rosalie. "Everything okay?" Alice sits down next to me and speaks to me before Rosalie gets a chance. "Emmett and Rosalie are in a fight," Alice chuckles.

"That is not funny, Alice!"

I could have sworn that Rosalie's face turned a little red, even though that's impossible. I chuckle softly, carefully, seeing her burning eyes looking at me. Esme quickly puts a plate in front of me on the bar and I look at it. It really looks delicious and I start eating straight away. After a few bites I turn to Alice and start talking again.

"Where is Edward?"

"He's not here today," Alice answers. "He, Emmett and Jasper are out on a hunting trip. They left this morning, and I think they will be back later tonight." Alice looks at me and sees my worried eyes. "They will be fine, of course. Nothing to worry about, at all." I nod at her and have difficulty with eating any more food. "Bella, they are fine. You know they always return and nothing ever happens to them. Believe me, if something would happen, I'd know before them." She winks at me and then I start to smile again. Of course, Alice always knows those things. I have nothing to worry about. I just don't understand why Edward didn't tell me he would be gone today.

"Edward left you something in his room. You can go see what it is now if you like. I already know, because I helped him," Alice chuckles. I smile back at her and thank Esme for the perfect lunch. "It was my pleasure, Bella," Esme nods and I turn around to head for the big staircase. How can it be that they are always so nice to me? I smile and walk upstairs, reaching Edwards room in just a few seconds. On his bed lies a big gift box with a smaller one on the top. "Oh, no. What did they get me this time? When it comes to gifts, Alice and Edward are the most generous givers. I start with opening the smallest box and find inside a wristband with my name and address on it. The band is bright orange, it almost hurts my eyes looking at it. Is this a joke? I start opening the second box and then I suddenly understand. Inside the box is a bikini, nicely wrapped in see-through foil. I take it out and admire the beautiful fabric. It is a black and brown bikini, with lace around the edges. It is absolutely the prettiest bikini I've ever seen. Quickly I start to undress myself and put on the new clothes. It looks amazing, even on me. My skin is pale and my body isn't the most curved one, but I just can't deny it. This bikini really flatters my figure. When I turn around I see Alice standing in the doorway.

"Isn't it pretty? I knew you would love it!"

I smile and nod. "This is gorgeous, Alice, thank you."

She walks in the room and stops next to me. "Turn, turn, let me see!" She's almost cheering with happiness. I turn a few times and laugh out loud. "Alice, I'm get dizzy. Tell me you've seen it all now." We both smile. "You can keep it on, since you and me are going to the beach, today!" I can hear in her voice that she can barely wait to get going. "Here," she adds, while handing me a brown dress. "This can go on top. Much more.. sunny!" I hold the dress in front of me and smile at Alice again. "Thank you."I put on the dress over my bikini and shiver. The fabric of the dress is soft and cold, it feels so good. As if Edward is standing against me, bare chest pressed to me..

"Are you ready? We should go if we want to have enough time to actually have our feet in the sand." Alice pulls me out of my daydream and I blink.

"Yes. Let's go!" As we walk down the stairs I realize I never thought of Alice with her feet in the sand. I thought of her as a person who never did things like that, especially since she can't be in the sun with other people close by. Thinking of that..

"Hey, Alice. How can we go to the beach if people can not see you in the sun?" "Easy, private beach, of course," Alice smiles. "Just us there today. Normally the whole family goes there for private amusement." I nod and follow her outside to her car. Edward finally gave her the yellow Porsche she asked for a long time ago. We both get in the car and get on our way to the Cullen private beach.

"We're here!" Alice cheers and I wake up from a daydream about Edward. I was thinking of how he was hunting dangerous animals at this very moment. Such a scary thing to think about..  
"Edward is fine, Bella," Alice smiled warmly. "I know you're always right, Alice, thank you." She nods and together we walk to the white sand beach close by. "Do you actually swim, Alice?" I should know the answer already since vampires are good at almost everything. "Sure," She answers. "I just don't do it a lot. Why get my hair wet if there's no good reason?" I chuckle and Alice to. "Good point." We get undressed and walk in our swimwear to the waterline. Quickly I dip my toe in the water and pull back even quicker. "Oh no, it's way too cold today to swim!" I moan loudly. Alice laughs out loud and walks into the water. Of course she's not cold. It wouldn't surprise me if Alice thought the water was warm, compared to her body warmth. I walk back to our clothes and sit down on a soft towel. Alice is still in the water, somewhere. I can't see her from here and wait a little for her to come back up. If only I could hold my breath that long.. I keep looking at the water but still no Alice to be found. Why is she taking so long? Is she stuck somewhere? I begin to worry, really bad, and pace close to the waterline. Ok, I'm going in.

I try to block out how cold the water actually is and think of Alice, maybe needing my help. I walk faster and deeper into the water, until it is deep enough to dive. I take a deep breath and let myself sink under water. The water is more clear that I would have expected. Sadly enough, I can't see Alice. Where is she. My heart is pounding in my throat while I get more nervous every second. I have to go back up to get air. The wind is cold in my hair. Before I can sink down again I feel two hands around my ankles.

"Damn it, Alice!" I shout.

I sink under water again and see her face right in front of me. Wow. I wish I looked like her. Her hair flows lightly with the movement of the water and her eyes are a perfect golden colour, even brighter now. She swims away from me and then comes back, showing me a beautiful seashell. Her lips are even more red now. They look so warm, instead of ice cold. As if for this moment she is a _human_ like me.. Her smile makes me smile to and for a second I forget to breathe. I almost choke on a breath filled with water, and quickly Alice lifts me up out of the water.

"Are you okay!? Bella, say something." Alice looks worried above my face. I see the water on her face, making her sparkle even more than the sun.

"Yes, I'm fine, I think."

We walk back through the water to the beach and sit down on the towel. Alice hands me a bottle of water, to make the salty seawater leave my mouth. "Thanks." Alice nods and I quickly take a sip. Much better. I feel weird but I look up at her face. What happened under water? The water has dried from her face, and the sun is now touching Alice's skin. I can barely make my eyes look somewhere else. And her lips, so cold, but deep red, like under water..

"How is the water?"

I hear _his_ voice and look up behind me.

"Edward.." I sigh.


	2. Chapter 2

Quickly I stand and wrap my arms tightly around his neck.

"Hmm.. you look so good. I missed you today, Bella."

I feel my face turn red while Edward smiles at me. Then, he slowly leans in and kisses me gently on the lips.

"I missed you more than you can imagine.." I breathe, after our kiss.

Edward grins and looks me deep in my eyes.

"You have no idea, Bella, what I am able to imagine."

I look away and lower my arms. Alice is standing close to us now, greeting Edward. I feel a little awkward and don't know why.

"Jasper and Emmett are on their way now." Alice tells me. "Not a girls day after all."  
I can see Alice pout.

"I thought that maybe later we could go shopping.."

I chuckle and feel guilty for ruining Alice's plans, even though it's not my fault.

"I'm not going anywhere, so I'm sure we can shop another day soon."

Alice's face lights up straight away and she bounces up and down a few times."All day? I can't wait! We could get facemasks and nail polish and spend the evening after watching movies and doing more girl stuff!"

I already regret what I promised. Edward chuckles seeing my desperate face. Just as Alice is about to tell me something, I hear Emmett's voice, loudly, calling us.

"Hot! Bikini babes!" I hear Emmett laugh out loud with his booming voice.

Alice and I start to laugh to. When he and Jasper are close enough, they greet us warmly. Jasper looks at me with a strange expression. Damn, I forgot. He can feel that I feel awkward.

"What did you girls do all day?" Jasper asks us. All of a sudden I remember what we did before Edward joined us. I feel my face flush again and Jasper keeps looking at me.

"I thought Alice was stuck under water, maybe drowning or something.." I explain to the boys.  
They all start to laugh and I hear how stupid that sounded. Alice doesn't even breathe. No one does but me.. Alice looks at me and smiles, understanding. "Sorry," I whisper, and she just keeps on smiling at me. I look away and give myself a mental slap against the back of my head. I say such stupid things sometimes. Alice is not human, but for that one second it felt like it..

"Bella, love..?"

It takes a few seconds to hear the words that are spoken to me. Edward is standing next to me in his perfect swim shorts.

"Do you want to go swimming with me, or do you prefer staying on dry land?"

I look at the sea, and then back at Edward.

"Sure, but you better stay close to me!"

"Bella, I won't drown.." Edward winks at me.  
We both chuckle and walk towards the sea. Everyone is already in the water when Edward and I join. I remind myself to take a deep breath before diving this time. Edward takes my hand and together we dive under the waves. I can see Emmett and Jasper playing some kind of underwater game. Again, Alice is gone. I look at Edward and he smiles his perfect crooked smile. Quickly I swim back to the surface for air. While I stare at the spot where we left our clothes, I see someone sitting there. It's Alice. Maybe she didn't want to swim anymore..  
Before I can wonder on I feel two icy hands run across my body. Then, soft, cold lips touching my hips. I shiver. I take a deep breath and let myself sink into Edward's arms. His arms are wrapped around my middle and I wrap my arms and legs around his body. We start kissing passionately. His perfect chest pressed against my skin, I can't get enough. His kisses reach my neck and I shiver again. For a brief second I open my eyes. There she is again. _Alice.  
_I close my eyes and press myself harder to Edward. Damn, forgot again. I need air. I struggle out of Edward's arms and swim back up. Another mental slap. _Breathe, Bella, Breathe_!

When the sun is lowering in the sky, we decide to head back home. I check one last time if we didn't forget anything. In the sand I see a beautiful seashell, glistening in the last rays of sunshine. I pick it up and look at it closely. When I remember, I look up and see Alice looking away quickly. Or wasn't she even paying attention to me? I shake my head. What is wrong with me? I put the seashell in my bag and walk to the car.

_Mermaid Alice_


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you so much for the reviews. I understood that some of you don't quite get the story, so I hope this new chapter will make things a little more clear. This is my first fan fiction in English, so maybe that is the problem, but I hope you'll like this new chapter. Tell me what you think, of course!**

**x IertjeAshfan**

**The song Alice is listening to; The Vitamin String Quartet - I caught myself**

* * *

BPOV

Once we're back at the Cullen's house Edward wraps me tightly in his arms. I let out a deep sigh. It was nice at the beach today with Alice, but I really missed Edward a lot. He stares at me with his bright, golden eyes and I feel my face flush. Edward is so beautiful.  
These last few years were the most perfect ones of my whole life. The day the Cullen's moved into Forks, my life changed for the better. He and his family we're different, I noticed straight away. They all had that perfect, flawless skin tone, dark eyes and graceful walks. I remember so well, as if it was yesterday that I first laid eyes on Edward.  
It was at school with Jessica and Angela. They were trying to convince me of how much fun a school dance could be.

_Jeez.. How much fun could a party be when everyone was drunk or high, girls grinding into some random guy like it was some sexual festival.._

But then, my eyes focussed on someone else. There he was. Edward. For the first time at our school, and girls were loving him, naturally. He looked perfect, everyone noticed. Even _I_ noticed, and I'm not the kind of girl who looks at every cute guy that walks by. His eyes found mine when I least expected it.

_Boom.._

As if lightening had struck me, I froze and felt my heart moving up to my throat.

_Look away, Bella, look away._

I saw him smile a crooked smile at me and I felt so embarrassed.

_Great, now he must think about what an idiot I am, almost drooling over his presence.._

Instead, Edward's smile grew bigger, as it reached over his whole face, and walked towards me. All the while he kept his eyes focussed on mine. Before I could blink again he was standing in front of us. Jessica and Angela were also staring at him, giggling and turning red. He just kept on smiling at me.

_Shit, fuck.. oh no.. Think of something smart to say. Be charming, try, Bella!_

"Good afternoon, girls."

His velvet, masculine voice erupted a shiver that coursed through my whole body. I was sure my face looked like a tomato at this point. Angela and Jessica said nothing but just kept on giggling.

_Could they be more annoying? Why do girls always do that? Wait.. wasn't I just doing the same.._

I kept on staring into his eyes, amazed by the golden colour. Never had I seen eyes like that before.

_How many minutes did just pass? SAY SOMETHING YOU DUMB GIRL!_

"I'm.. B..Bella," I managed to stutter at him. He reached out his hand for mine to shake it, and I quickly grasped it.

_Jeez, Bella. You look desperate.._

"Hello, Bella. My name is Edward. Cullen." I kept shaking his hand while he started laughing.

_You can let go now.._

I let go of his hand, wishing I didn't had to, and then shoved it into my pocket. He chuckled and I stared at his lips. They were some kind of pale, grey-red colour.

_Omg, Bella! Get a grip on yourself. You're out of control._

"You're new here, aren't you? How do you like our school so far?" I found it quite difficult to talk to him, since he made me stutter and stare.

"Yes, I am. And I find your school very interesting." He nodded.

"Close to the subject I wanted to talk to you about," He continued. "Could you maybe show me where.. I can find the.."

_Bella, damn it! Stop looking at his lips. Look into his eyes, he is talking to you!_

"Bella..?"

_Shit, now I didn't hear what he said. DUMB ASS._

"Sorry, what did you want me to show you?" I couldn't get more red than I was now.

He chuckled and pointed at his school map. His pale finger pointed at the gym. Luckily I knew where to find that, and nodded, smiling.

"I'm sure Bella will return to you girls, as soon as she showed me the way."

Edward looked at Jessica and Angela and they both flushed again. I knew exactly how they felt. They both nodded at me and quickly I turned away, walking next to Edward Cullen to the gym. I could feel people stare at me, but for once I didn't care. He asked _me_, personally, to show him the way, and I was happy to oblige. On our way we started talking and felt a strong connection between us.

Ever since that day we grew closer, even though things changed a lot when he told me that he was a _vampire.. _But never for a second I doubted my feelings for him, and told him that there was no way I would ever leave him. I knew this was true, I felt it deep in my soul. There was no love like this. There _is _no love like this.

* * *

"Do you want to stay here for the night, or shall I take you home?"

Edward holds my hand while we walk up the stairs to his bedroom.

"I'd like to stay, if that is ok with you, and your parents, of course."

"Bella, don't be silly. You know you're always welcome at our house. You are family, you know. You belong with me." Edward looks at me, seriously. I nod at him and smile.

He's about to speak again but I press my lips on his before he can do so. He takes me in his arms and answers my kiss. I think I'll never get enough of Edward. His kisses are perfect and different every time. I close my eyes and feel his hand on the small of my back.

"Hmm.." I moan. I shiver and he kisses me more roughly, I feel his desire growing by the second.

"Bella, love. We should stop."

_These are the words I hear too often. I know this is hard for him, but can't he see that it's hard for me to? After years, I am so ready to take this to a new level.._

"Hmm.." I sigh. "Okay, you're right."

_I'm not going to push this. Not tonight._

Edward looks at me. His eyes look sad, his lips are staying in a forced smile.

"You really look beautiful, Bella." he murmurs.

I try to hide my disappointment and lean my head on his shoulder, looking out the window.

"You are perfect, as always, Edward."

* * *

Before going to bed, I suddenly long for a hot shower. Maybe that will ease the tingling sensation going on in my lower stomach. I peck Edward on the lips and quickly take a clean towel with me to the bathroom. On my way over there I walk past Alice's room. Through the gap of her door, which is slightly opened, I see flickering lights, maybe candlelight, and I hear Alice's voice humming a beautiful melody. The music that accompanies her sounds dramatic, loud, but also really beautiful. The sound of violins and cello's are vibrating in my ears. When Alice starts humming again I decide to walk on to the bathroom.  
Quickly I get undressed and step under the hot water, coming from the shower.

_Hmm.. this feels so good._

The hot water almost burns my skin, but that's just how I like to shower. A red glow soon appears on my shoulders and legs. I decide to also wash my hair, so it no longer smells like the sea. If only I had my strawberry shampoo with me.. I look over at the wall where all the shower gels and soap bars are lying. My eyes fall on a pearly, purple bottle of shampoo and I reach for it. When I open it a wonderful scent fills my nose. I can't quite place it, though. It smells familiar. I pour it on my hand and then rub it all through my hair.

_This really smells so good. Like a mix of all nice scents._

I close my eyes as I step under the shower completely and let the water wash everything off. The soap, as well as my horny tingles that spread through my whole body. I can't wait to get a good nights sleep. I step out of the shower and dry myself quickly. When the towel is wrapped around my body, I pick up my stuff from the floor and open the door.

_Oh, the air in the hallway is freezing cold!_

I step on the cold marble floor with bare feet and shiver.

_I always forget my socks. Why do I do that? Mental note; take socks next time!_

When I walk through the hallway I see that Alice's door is wide open now. I stop in front of it and see Alice sitting on her bed, reading a magazine while listening to something, big headphones on her head. It looks funny, actually. Alice's head is small and perfect, and the headphones are way too big for her. I chuckle. Suddenly her head pops up and sees my chuckling face. She removes the headphones and smiles back at me.

"What is so funny?" she chuckles.

"Oh, just your headphones. They look so big on you."

We both chuckle and I walk into her room, leaning against her doorpost.

"It was really nice today. Better not scare me again like that, though." I smile at her and she winks at me.

"I'm sorry, Bella, I had to try something to get you into the water. And guess what? It worked." Her face looks totally smug.

"Yes, it worked. But next time.. I'll be prepared." I wink.

It's quiet for a while and we stare at each other.

"Well, it was fun. Just wanted to tell you."

Alice smiles at me."Yes, and we'll go shopping soon. You promised, Bella," her smug face still smiling.

"Love to. Goodnight, Alice."

"Night night, Bella."

I turn around and walk out of Alice's room. Quickly I run through the hallway and into Edward's room. Edward is lying down on his bed while looking strangely at me.

"What's the hurry?" he chuckles.

"Cold.." I breathe loudly, from running.

I pull open Edward's drawer of clothes and pull out one of his boxer briefs. I put it on and without wasting any time I slip under the black satin sheets. Edward tucks me in and lies closely next to me. His fingers caress my yaw, down to my shoulder. I push my head against his shoulder and inhale his scent deeply.

_I wish we could lie like this forever. Maybe better if he was lying under the sheets to, in the same amount of clothes.. Oh, fuck. The tingles are still there._

As I ignore my tingles, Edward rests his arm around my waist and I close my eyes.

"I love you, Edward."

"Just sleep, Bella. I'll be here looking after you all night."

I smile at him, not opening my eyes, and know that he's true. I can't feel much safer than I do at the moment.

"I love you too, Bella."

I drift off in his arms and feel the world around me fading out. All I hear in the background is a lovely melody, pulsing through my veins..


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you for reviewing. I know that the first chapters have a lot of Edward/Bella in them, but this story is after all about Alice, Bella & Edward, so he won't fully leave the story. But, I can assure you, the coming chapters will have a lot more Alice/Bella in it. Hope you enjoy it!**

**x IertjeAshfan**

* * *

**APOV**

I sit silently on my bed as I hear the sound of Bella's footsteps fade, off to Edward's bedroom. When his door closes I get up quickly and walk to the hallway. I can smell Bella all through the house.

_Why am I focussing on Bella's smell? Why do I care..? _

I shake my head and walk down the staircase, heading for the kitchen. I really enjoy the silence, it makes me feel calm. When I sit down at the breakfast bar I close my eyes, smiling as I remember this afternoon. Bella looked so beautiful in her new bikini.

_ALICE! Stop this. Why am I thinking of Bella in her bikini!? _

Suddenly I feel a strange tingle inside my stomach.

_Huh..?_

I get up and quickly put on some soft music. The music overflows my body and I twirl around the house. My eyes are closed and I let every note fill my head. Suddenly the music fades into the background and I see two perfect, brown eyes, staring at me. I open my eyes and search through the room. No. I'm all alone. Bella isn't here.  
Slowly I close my eyes again and try to focus on the music again.

_"Goodnight, Alice.." _

Her voice echoes through my head. I keep dancing around the room and realize it won't work trying to block her out of my mind.

_Why is Bella stuck in my mind.. _

I stop and stand still in the middle of the living room. A vision hits me.

_Bella, laughing. Dark. Living room. Myself. Emotions. Tears. Laughter.._

My mouth is agape and I have no idea what this vision means. I sink down on the sofa and close my eyes once more.

_You know you want to be with her. You need more time with her._

I blink and try to stop all the nonsense going on in my head. What could all this mean? Of course, I know I love spending time with Bella. It's like she's always been in our family. I just love the way she laughs when we are having fun together..

"Alice..?"

I jump up from the sofa, surprised.

"Alice, we're you actually surprised?"

It's only Esme.

_Actually, this is the first time I didn't see something coming. Wow.. I never ever had this before.. I always know.. everything.._

"Yes, hmm.. I think so.. Why are you downstairs so late?"

Esme walks closer to me and hugs me for a short moment. She has always been my mother. Never does it feel strange, to have such a strong bond with someone who is not even real family.

"I just didn't feel like reading in the study anymore. Your dad is still busy with his work.."

I nod, silently, and realize the music is still playing.

"And you?"

The vision flashes through my mind.

"Oh. I was just.. uhm.. dancing and listening music, as I do most of the time." I wink at Esme and we both chuckle.

"You've always been so passionate about dancing. It's lovely to see you dance, so caught up in the music.."

I smile at Esme. I love the way we can be so close.

"Well, Alice, I think I'll go back up now. Hopefully your dad will be done too, soon."

We hug tightly and then Esme walks back upstairs. I decide I should better go up to my room again and turn off the music. Once upstairs I stop in front of Edward's room. I listen quietly and hear no voices.

_"Goodnight, Alice."_

Edward's voice in my head makes me jump, again.

_Second time, damn it! How can this happen to me? And I totally forgot! Would Edward know what I was thinking.._

_"Just go to bed, Alice. I wasn't listening to your impure thoughts about hot guys.."_

I sigh.

_"Why would you think I'm listening to your thoughts when I have Bella next to me..? You know how I feel when she's here.."_

_I do know how he feels.._

_"Goodnight, Edward."_

Quickly I block my thoughts, thinking of music, and walk to my own bedroom.

_He can't know about my visions. He can't know that I feel strange around Bella.._

I lie down on my bed and close my eyes. Edward is focussing on Bella again and I lie here, alone. If only I had someone to hold through the night. Someone who would hold me and I could hold back.. I take my headphones from my desk and put on soft music again. Immediately I see brown eyes again. Bella's eyes. Instead of wonder why, I just surrender to what I'm seeing and let my mind take it's course.

*  
_Bella smiles at me widely. Slowly she walks towards me and I reach out my arms._

_"I want to hold you so bad.." she whispers._

_I start walking to and meet her halfway. My arms quickly wrap around her body. She feels so warm against my cold skin._

_"You smell delicious.." I moan in her ear._

_"You more.." Bella answers, and I let my fingers slide through her hair._

_"We can't do this, Bella.." I whisper while taking her face in my hands. "Think of Edward.."_

_Bella nods at me and her hands close around my face too._

_"I know.. but I can't help it.. I can't help longing for you.. Alice.."_

_Bella leans towards me and I feel her breasts, underneath the tight pyjamas that she's wearing, touch mine. Then, she presses her lips against mine and I shiver. Her lips feel so soft, and warm. I press harder against her lips and answer her kiss. Softly I feel her hot tongue slide across my bottom lip._

_"Oh, Bella.."_

_Our tongues meet and Bella wraps her arms around my neck._

_"I need you, Bella.." I whisper._

_Bella nods and we kiss deeper, more passionate. My fingers start caressing her soft skin. Her cheeks, her neck and shoulders, her upper arms.._

_"Not there.. Here.." Bella says and takes my hands, only to put them on top of her delicious curves. I moan softly and press my fingers into her perfect body._

_"Please stay with me, Bella.."_

_Her longing eyes stare into mine, we kiss again.._

I open my eyes widely and stare at the ceiling. This can't be right! Bella belongs to Edward.. right?

* * *

**BPOV**

_The darkness in Alice's room feels strangely good. I can't see everything in the room, but the light coming through the window makes me see her clearly. Her eyes are a bright red colour. Am I in danger..? I walk towards her, she's sitting on her bed._

_"Stop, Bella," Alice says to me. I stop for a second and look into her red eyes._

_"Why? I want to talk to you." I whisper, trembling._

_"I'm hungry for you, Bella.." Alice keeps staring at me._

_I feel a shiver run down my spine. Still, I step forward, reaching out for her._

_"No, Bella, I'm dangerous, go back!" Alice says louder this time. "Can't you see!? I'm so hungry for you.. all of you.."_

_Before Alice can say more I jump towards her and wrap my arms around her._

_"No.. no, NO..!" Alice whimpers, trying to struggle herself gently out of my hold, making sure I don't get hurt._

_"Why, Alice, why are you like this? What's wrong?"_

_I try and calm her down in my arms. Suddenly, Alice stops struggling and looks at me. We stand there, pressed together in the dark, staring. Then, Alice leans forward. I freeze and assume she's going to bite me._

_"No, ALICE!" I scream in shock, but before I can push her away I feel her lips pressing against my neck._

_Huh? What did just happen?_

_"So hungry.." Alice whispers once more. Her lips trail kisses up and down my neck. All of a sudden she steps back. Her eyes wide open, in total horror. Before I can blink she's out the window. Quickly I run to the window._

_"Alice, where are you going?" I shout._

_In the distance I see Alice running away from me. I feel like screaming and try to run after her but my feet feel glued to the floor._

_"Alice, come back, please!" I shout again. "I need you, come back.. ALICE!!"_

..

"Bella, Bella! Wake up!" Edward calls.

I open my eyes quickly and see Edward close to me. His whole face shows signs of shock.

"Are you ok? Bella? You had a nightmare. You kept screaming Alice's name.."

I stare into his eyes and feel tears welling up.

"Is Alice ok? Where is she?" I ask, trying really hard not to cry.

"Alice is fine, Bella. She's in her room, probably listening music. Nothing's wrong."

I sigh and press myself against Edward's chest.

"You're safe here, Bella, I'm here now," Edward coos.

I hear sobs breaking out of my throat and I sit up for a moment.

"Can I go to Alice for a second, please. I know she's ok, like you say, but I think I would feel a lot better seeing her myself."

My sobs make it harder to talk. Edward looks into my eyes and smiles.

"Of course, love, if that makes you feel better. If you're looking for me later, I'll be downstairs. I really feel like playing piano."

I smile at Edward through my tears and softly he wipes them away. Quickly I take his hand and press a kiss on his cold skin.

"Thank you, Edward. I love you." I whisper.

"It's fine, of course. I love you too, Bella."

Edward smiles at me and kisses me on my lips. Then, he turns around and walks out of the room. I follow him but walk towards Alice's room. I knock but no one answers. Surely she must have heard me. And even if she didn't, she must have seen that I was coming to her room.. I open the door and see Alice lying on her bed. Her eyes are wide open and she has her headphones on again. Maybe that's why she didn't hear me. I walk closer to her bed, and suddenly she jumps up, looking wildly at me.

"Bella, what is wrong!? Why are you crying!? Where's Edward?"

She comes closer and wraps her arms around me tightly. I start sobbing again.

"Edward is downstairs. I just wanted to see you. I had a nightmare.. about you.." I answer slowly, trying not to break down more."Edward says I was screaming your name, Alice. I was so scared. You were here.. and then.. you left. You ran from me!"

More tears run down my cheeks and Alice presses me closer to her.

"Bella, I won't ever run from you, I promise.." she whispers in my ear, and I feel a tingle go through my veins.

_If she only knew what my dream was about. I'm sure she would run as fast as she could.._

I press Alice close to me and inhale her scent. The exact same scent as the shampoo I used in the shower. It's delicious. Alice takes my hand and makes me sit down on her bed.

"Do you want to talk to me about your nightmare, Bella?" Alice smiles at me and wipes away the escaped tears.

"You know you can tell me everything."

_Shit.._


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you all again for reviewing and adding the story to your favourite, and following of course. It makes me want to write more and more. Hope you like this new chapter. Please review, I love waking up to new reviews ^.^**

**x IertjeAshfan**

* * *

**BPOV**

"Well.." I start.

_How could I possibly tell Alice what I dreamt? I can't even believe it.._

Tears roll down my cheeks again. Alice keeps wiping them away, smiling gently at me.

"You and I were in this room." I breathe, almost whispering to her.

My heart beats somewhere in my throat, embarrassed of my own dream.

"You can just tell me, Bella. I'm here for you.." Alice's hand lies in mine and for a moment she squeezes it, comfortingly.

I sigh loudly and look into her perfect, golden eyes.

_So different than the red eyes that had looked at me in my dream._

"Your eyes, they were red. You looked at me. You were sitting on the bed, and I wanted to talk to you, but you wanted me to stay away.."

Alice looks at me sadly, understanding, and puts her other hand on my hand to.

"Why would I want that, Bella. You know I would never be like that to you."

I nod and smile weakly, staring at her hands on mine.

"You also said.." I blush and start sobbing again.

_I just can't tell her this, can I? She'll laugh at me and never speak to me again after.. But we never keep things a secret. Not Alice and I._

"What did I say, Bella? It's okay.."

"Well.. you said.. You said that you were hungry for me.."

Alice's eyes open widely, in shock I guess, and she shakes her head at me.

"No! Bella! Did I hurt you? Poor girl! No wonder you are so scared! I would never hurt you, you know that, don't you!?" Alice rambles on.

"No, you didn't hurt me. At all," I whisper while she hugs me tightly.

I don't think Alice hears my words, she holds me close, pressed against her chest. I inhale deeply and decide to just stop thinking about it.

_It was crazy anyway.._

"You aren't scared of me now, are you..?" She whispers, sounding a little scared.

I shake my head against her chest and tears are streaming down now, for real.

"I'm not. Alice, I need you.."

For a second it feels as if Alice stiffens a little while holding me against her, and then relaxes again.

"I'm always here for you. Bella, you are way too dear to me. I'm glad you told me.." she sighs, her chin leaning on my head.

I close my eyes and just focus on Alice. Her cold skin touching my arms, the small of my back. A shiver runs down my spine.

_If only she knew.._

"You can tell me if you're scared, Bella. I won't be upset. It's not your fault. It's us, we are different, not you.. I won't ever hurt you."

I wrap my arms around her tightly.

"Oh, Alice," I sigh. "I'm never scared of you."

* * *

**APOV**

Softly I press my nose in Bella's hair.

_How adorable. She used my shampoo.. It smells way better on her than on me.._

"Sorry, I used your shampoo, Alice." Bella's voice sounds a little embarrassed. "But I didn't know it was yours, I just picked it because it smells so good.."

I smile and stroke her through her hair.

"It's fine, Bella. Don't worry. You can keep it as your own if you like."

She smells so good.

_If only she knew what I am thinking. She would be out of my arms within seconds, running off to Edward, maybe not talking to me anymore for the rest of eternity. _

Bella tries to sit up and I let go of her quickly.

"Feeling better?" I smile at her.

"Yes, thank you." Bella answers. "You always make me feel a lot better, Alice."

For a short moment we stare into each others eyes.

_Why is she staring at me like that.. is she scared? I don't know. I wish I could tell her about my dreams, too. But I just simply can't.._

"I think I should go back to Edward now," Bella sighs. It's almost as if she doesn't want to go.

Surely its just my imagination playing with me.

"Yes. I'm sure he's worried about you to. I'm here if you need me, Bella. No matter what, I'm always here for you.."

She smiles at me, shyly, almost blushing. Another thing I'm imagining?

"Night, Bella."

"Thank you, Alice. Goodnight.." Bella whispers.

She hugs me once more, then gets up from the bed quickly and walks out of the room. Before completely being out of sight, Bella turns around to stare at me, and then disappears into the hallway.

What is wrong with Bella? Is she not telling me something? She never stares at me like she is really scared of me.

_Oh, I hope not. I can't bare the thought of having to be without her.. _

I take my diary out of the desk and look for a pen. I haven't felt like writing for a long time, but now I just want to write my feelings down. I open the tiny book and let my pen slide across the paper.

_Dear Diary,_

_I know it has been a long time since I wrote. Now, I just really need to get rid of some emotions. My brother's girlfriend, Bella.. Since today things are heading in the wrong direction. I had a vision about her. It were just flashes, all including the both of us. Bella and me. I don't know what to do.._

I close my eyes for a moment and hear Bella's voice. She's crying, really loud.

_I thought things were okay, she looked fine when she left my room.. Maybe I am wrong again.._

I get up and think of taking a shower. Maybe that would be nice, take a little time to turn my thoughts back to normal.

_"Alice, what is wrong with Bella?" _Edward's voice sounds in my head.

I sigh.

_I should be more careful from now on. I keep forgetting that Edward could easily know what goes through my head._

_"She had a nightmare, about me. Bella dreamt that I was telling her I was hungry for her.."_

I hear Edward chuckle in my mind. I don't really see how this is funny.

_"You? Hungry for Bella? Ha-ha, you are not dangerous at all.." _

_"Edward! This is not funny! What if she thinks I'm a monster. What if she's scared of me!?" _

_"Relax, Alice. I'm sure Bella would never be scared of you. Her dreams are just a little.. vivid." _

How can my brother be laughing about this. He knows that Bella should be afraid of us. He knows it's not normal for a human to be around vampires all the time. It's not the way it's supposed to be.

_"I'm sure Bella will be fine. Talk soon.." _

With those words he leaves my mind. I'm sure he's holding her tight now.

_Why do I suddenly feel so jealous? I've never been jealous, not about anything.._

Quickly I close my diary and pick up a reading book. I should change my thoughts as soon as possible.

* * *

**BPOV**

"What are you laughing about, Edward?"

I look at him and he looks serious again.

"Alice isn't dangerous, you know that don't you?" Edward stares into my eyes and I shiver. "She would never hurt you. Nor would I, or anyone else in this family.."

I nod and smile at him, weakly, through my crying.

"I know Edward. It was just a dream.."

I stare at my feet, slowly pressing my toes against the marble floor. Earlier I felt so cold, having to run barefoot across the hallway. Now I'm totally fine. It doesn't even feel cold anymore.

"Do you want to go back to bed, love? It is 3.15 am and I think you should try and get some more sleep." Edward whispers in my ear, while wrapping me tightly in his arms.

"Yes, that would be good.." I sigh, and take his hand in mine.

Together we walk through the house, up the staircase and back into his room. When I lie down on my side of the bed I feel that my pillow is a bit clammy.

_Such an intense dream.. not a nightmare at all, but everyone else thinks it was.._

I turn my pillow so I can lie on the dry side, and lie my head on it. It feels as if thousands of people are whispering inside my head. Every single one talking about Alice..  
Edward lies down next to me under the sheets and pulls me to his chest.

"No more nightmares, ok, Bella?" he whispers, smiling gently at me.

I nod and smile back at him.

_IT. WASN'T. A. FUCKING. NIGHTMARE.!!! Well.. not all of it.._

Tears fill my eyes and I close them quickly. Edward doesn't notice, or if he does, he's not showing it.

"Edward.." I whisper, in the darkness of the room.

"Yes, love..?" he answers.

"Can I sleep in Alice's room tonight, please..?"

It's quiet for a moment.

_I shouldn't have asked. How stupid am I? Would Edward think strangely about it..? FUCK_

"Of course.. You know I'd rather have you in my arms every night, but the last thing I want is to have you feeling bad, and me keeping you from feeling better."

I see his white teeth while he smiles at me. His lips press a soft kiss on my forehead. Tears roll down on my pillow and I sit up quickly, stepping out of the bed.

"Think of me.." Edward whispers.

"I always do.." I answer him.

_I lied.._

I turn and walk towards Alice's room, closing Edward's bedroom door behind me. When I reach her room the door is already open. Alice is sitting on her bed, waiting for me, with a small bed prepared on the floor next to hers. As soon as I look into her eyes a tear escapes from mine.

_Why do I feel this way? _

Alice walks towards me, closes the door behind me and takes my hand to lead me to her bed.

"Sshh.. It's okay, Bella. It's all going to be okay.." Alice coos.

_How could she know? Maybe.. maybe she had a vision of all this! Does she know..?_

Alice has pressed my head against her shoulder and I keep still, still wondering if she already knows what's going to happen. If she knows what goes on inside my head..

"You should sleep, Bella. We can talk more in the morning, if you want. I'm not going anywhere.."

Alice has her arms around my waist.

"Can I sleep in your bed, please?" I ask, almost whispering.

"Sure, I'll sleep on the floor." Alice nods.

Before she can get up I take her arm in my hands.

"No, please stay here with me.."

Alice looks at me for a moment. Her eyes look questioning and her mouth is agape.

_Great. Now she must think I'm stupid. Which sisters sleep in the same bed?_

"Ok.." she whispers back at me, after a few seconds.

_Tingles flow through my veins.._

She pulls up the covers and lies down on one side. I quickly step in bed next to her, lying on my side, facing her. Alice places the covers back on top of us and we lie there for a moment, uncomfortable.

"If you want me to sleep on the other bed, you can tell me, Alice.." I whisper.

Without saying anything she takes my arm and places it around her body. I shiver for a second.

_Her skin feels ice cold, but perfect.. _

I wait for a short moment, wondering if I could lie my head against her shoulder again, like the way she held me while sitting up.

"Are you comfortable like this?" Alice whispers, her voice erupting tingles through my body.

I take my head off the pillow and place it in between her shoulder and chest.

"Now I am.." I whisper back.

Am I dreaming again?

* * *

**  
APOV**

I still can't believe Edward let Bella sleep in my room this night. When Bella asked if I could sleep in the same bed with her I thought I was going insane.

_Maybe I heard her wrong.._

But now, she's lying here with her arm around my waist, her head on my chest.. Surely she just wants to be close to her sister.

_Sister.._

I let my fingers slide through her hair, still a little stiffened because I can't understand the way Bella thinks about me.

_I thought she was scared of me.._

_"Look after Bella tonight," _Edward's voice sounds in my mind.

_"Sure, you know I will, Edward."_

I sigh deeply. Bella shivers and I press her closer to me.

_"Goodnight, sis."_

_"Night.."_

I block my mind and look at Bella. Her eyes are closed. I can feel her heartbeat, it's fast and loud.

"Bella, are you still sca.." I start but Bella talks before I can end my sentence.

"I'm not scared of you, Alice. Never will be. You are the sweetest person I know.."

Bella sighs and warm air touches my skin. This time I shiver.

"Sweet dreams, Bella." I whisper in her hair.

"Night, Alice.." she whispers back at me, snuggling her head more towards the middle of my chest and closing her arm tighter around my waist.

I keep my fingers tangled in her hair and my free hand lies on her back, keeping her close. I keep reminding myself that I can't think of anything that would make Edward wonder. I let out a deep sigh.

_This is going to be harder than I thought.._


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi there!**

**I'm glad so many of you are following this story, and I'm also glad you like what I'm writing. I'm so enthusiastic about it, I just can't stop writing! But maybe that is a good thing, so I don't have to keep you nice people waiting.**  
**Enjoy!**

**x IertjeAshfan**

* * *

**APOV**

All night I've been lying in bed, silently, trying not to move. Bella sleeps still, I hear her breath softly, it caresses my skin. It has been a long time since I have slept, and I can't remember what it is like. I close my eyes and focus on Bella's breathing. The sun is just about to show it's glory in the early morning hours. I can't believe the night has passed so quickly. I think of everything that happened last night.

"Alice.." Bella murmurs.

"I'm here, Bella. Just sleep.." I whisper, caressing her warm cheek.

Bella moves her leg up, still sleeping, and rests it on my waist. She is wrapped around me and feels like a hot water bottle, but slightly bigger.. I let my hand hover above her leg, not touching her skin.

_Stop it, Alice. This is insane.._

I know I can't take this much longer, lying here with Bella so close, pressed to my own body. Carefully, I get up and out of bed, placing pillows underneath Bella's arm and leg so she won't notice I left the bed. I stand back and watch her sleep. Bella snuggles her head into the pillow more and doesn't notice I'm gone. Softly I leave the room and run towards the shower. I have to get her scent off me as soon as soon as possible.

_She smells too.. too good.._

Once in the shower I take my shower gel and rub it all over me, making sure I get every inch. After that I wash my hair, repeating it twice, to make sure there's no Bella left on me.

_Sadly enough.._

Wrapped in a towel I look at myself in the mirror. I'm sure that if it was possible I would blush right now. I focus on the voices I hear outside the bathroom and murmur one of my favourite songs. I'm sure Edward didn't focus on my mind last night, otherwise he would have barged into my room and taken Bella as far away from me as possible..  
When I reach my room, still wrapped in the towel, I see Edward sitting next to Bella, on my bed. Bella looks at me, then back at Edward, and starts to blush.

_What a delicio..Thissss issss how we'll dance whennnn... when they try to take us doownn!!_

Edward pops his head up to watch me, then smiles and looks back at Bella.

_Thank god for Paramore.. _

I block my thoughts and walk towards my walk-in-closet. What shall I wear today? It will be lovely weather in the afternoon, I've seen it, and Bella and I are going to shop until she's no longer able to walk. I pick out a purple dress and a grey legging to go underneath with a pair of purple ballerina flats. Surely this will fine. When I walk out of the closet Edward is no longer sitting with Bella, and she looks up at me through her eyelashes.

"Morning," Bella says, smiling at me.

_Ohhh glooooorryyyyyyyy, ohhh gloryyyyyy! This isssss how we'll daaaaance whenn...._

"Morning, Bella. Did you sleep okay?" I smile back at her.

"Yes, amazingly without any more nightmares.." she says, nodding her head.

_If I could blush.. ..SO LET THE FLAMES BEGIN..!!_

I change the subject and look at her pyjamas.

_Wrong idea..!!_

"So, what are you going to wear today?" I ask, trying to act as normal as possible.

"Well, Alice, I'm sure I'll look like a tomboy again next to you. Your dress looks beautiful on you!" Bella smiles at me and I remind myself to keep blocking my thoughts. Suddenly, another vision.

_Bella. Accident. Shops. Blood. Resisting. Touch. _

_Damn it, why are they in flashes!? I still have no clue about the last vision, and now this one makes even less sense._

"Alice! Are you ok? Did you have a vision?" Bella has my arm in her hands and looks at me, a touch of panic in her brown eyes.

"I'm fine, Bella. Relax. I have visions all the time so they don't scare me at all. I just saw that today is going to be a perfect, sunny shopping day!"

Bella groans but with a playful smile on her lips.

"Really, Bella, no tomboy clothes today." I look at her and wink playfully. "I'm going to find you some clothes in my closet, and you are going to wear them!"

Quickly I run into my closet with vampire speed and grab the clothes I think would look nice on her. A black knee-length dress with a pair of silver ballerina flats.

"Here," I say, smiling brightly, while handing her the dress and shoes. "This will do just fine."

Bella looks at me, sighs and then decides not to argue with me this morning. While she walks towards the bathroom I quickly open my diary again and write my vision down.

_Surely they must mean something. I just don't know what..  
_

* * *

**BPOV**

When I walk into the bathroom it smells amazing. The damp of an earlier shower still hangs in the air and pearly drops of water drip down the Italian tiles on the walls.

_Alice was here, minutes ago.. _

My heart skips a beat while thinking of Alice taking a shower.

_Bella. Focus on Edward, damn it!_

I take off my pyjamas and put on the shower. The water feels hot and steam quickly spreads through the small space. I let out a soft moan while the hot water makes my skin tingle. When I think of reaching out for a bottle of shower gel my eyes fall on the two wet bottles on the side.

_Alice used those two.._

Without thinking I let my fingers slide down the bottle of shower gel, as if I could touch a little part of Alice while doing this.. Then, the next bottle. Shampoo. I pick it up and hold it in my hands for a moment. While squeezing out the shampoo on my hand I feel a cold breeze run through the shower.

"Who is there?" I ask. I try to see who it is but the steam doesn't let me.

_Please let it be Alice, please, please please.._

"Bella.. it's me.." I hear Edward's voice whispering.

_..Oh..Edward.._

"Mind if I join..?"

Slowly he walks towards me, wearing nothing but his boxer briefs.

_Damn, hot!_

"Hmm.. Edward. You look.. perfect." I moan.

"There are no right words for telling how you look right now, Bella," he whispers in my ear.

He takes of his remaining underwear and steps into the shower, standing still next to me. My knees are shaking and I quickly wrap my free hand around his neck, before falling or something, still holding the shampoo in the other hand.

"Where you going to wash your hair?" Edward asks me, smiling sweetly at me while pointing at the bottle I'm holding.

"Well.."

_I was actually just holding this bottle because Alice touched it, too. _

"Yes. I love the smell of this shampoo." I answer him, not lying.

Edward takes the bottle from my hands.

_Ouch.._

"Let me.." he sighs against my ear.

A shiver runs through my body. Gently, he wipes the shampoo off my hand, into his, and rubs it between his hands before spreading it through my hair. Immediately I smell Alice's scent again. Another shiver runs down my spine.

"You like this?" Edward asks me.

_God yes, Edward. If you only knew.._

I nod and look into his golden eyes. They are filled with love and care, for me.

_Surely I'm going to pay for this.. sometime.._

Edward's hands are still rubbing the shampoo through my hair when I suddenly push him against the cold shower wall. Of course, he doesn't notice the cold but looks me in my eyes. Before he can even think of saying something I press my lips against his, hard. A groan erupts from Edward's throat and I feel his length growing harder against my lower stomach. I slide my hands from his cheek down to his stomach, circling my fingers around his belly button.

"Bella, fuck.." Edward moans and I kiss him harder, more passionate. My tongue dances with his and I close my eyes to surrender more to my feelings.

_If only that was a good idea.._

_Behind my closed eyelids I see Alice, standing with me in the shower, instead of Edward. Her hands trace down my back, resting on my bottom. Her perfect golden eyes look into mine and I lean my head towards her face, pausing inches away from her lips. _

_"Kiss me, Bella.. I can't be away from you anymore.." _

_I lean in and kiss Alice's lips without hesitation._

"Damn, Bella. You are so perfect," Edward groans while his fingers press softly against my bottom.

I trace my fingers over his chest and see him shiver. Then, I grab his hard length firmly and start pleasing him. A low growl escapes his lips.  
I close my eyes again while pleasing Edward, making him moan softly.

_How would Alice sound if she moaned.._

A tingling sensation bubbles up in my lower stomach and I start working on Edward faster, firmer. His hands grab my bottom harder, letting me know he enjoys it, a lot.

"Oh.. Edward.." I moan.

_Thank god I said the right name.._

Tears well up in the corners of my eyes, rolling down before I can react to wipe them. Thankfully the shower makes it look like usual water falling down my cheeks. Edward still has his eyes closed.

"Bella, I think Alice is waiting for you.. We've been in here for almost half an hour, you know?" He smirks at me, making me blush and stare at my feet with guilt.

"We can shower for longer next time, Bella. It's ok."

I nod at him and fake a smile. All the guilt hits me in the face and I'm not sure how to act normal.

_I can't let it show.._

We step out of the shower and Edward wraps a towel around me.

"Have fun today, Bella. It's great that you and my sister get along so well." He smiles at me and kisses my cheek softly. "Tell Alice to take care of you, for me please."

"Of course, Edward. And you know I'm perfectly safe with Alice." I smile back at him and wrap my arms around his neck. It's hard to keep tears from appearing in my eyes, but I try.

"I'll miss you, Edward," I sigh, while one tear escapes from my eyes..

_Damn tears.._

"Bella, are you ok? I'm always close, you know I'm right here waiting for you to return. It's just one day with Alice. I'm sure you'll have a great time.."

I look into his eyes and feel a burning pain in my chest.

_See here, my punishment._

"Really, Bella. It's just one day.." Edward closes his arms around my waist and presses me hard against his chest.  
Slowly, I let go of him and he lets me out of his hold. I kiss him on his lips and look into his eyes once more.

"I love you, Edward.." I whisper.

"I love you, forever, Bella."

He kisses me gently and then walks out of the bathroom. I follow him out and then slowly walk over to Alice's room.

"Bella! Gosh, that took ages! Get dressed quickly so we can finally get going." She winks at me and sits down on her bed.

I blush while looking at her, almost too shy to get out of my towel in front of Alice. For a moment she looks at me, then turns her head away to face the wall.

"It's okay, Bella. I won't look if you're uncomfortable."

I feel my face flush even more and quickly drop the towel on the floor.

_Am I imagining that I heard Alice gasp..?_

I put on the dress that Alice chose for me this morning, and quickly put on my shoes.

"Done," I whisper, knowing she can hear me.

Before I can blink she has turned to face me and her mouth is agape. My face surely must look like a tomato right now, and I giggle nervously.

"Bella.. you look.." Alice starts. "You.. Look like a girl!" She starts to laugh really loud.

_Wow, did she always laugh like this, or did I just never notice how perfect it sounds?_

"Joking,' she winks at me.

I can't help but laugh with her. She's right. I always look a little boyish.  
Quickly I dry my hair and put on some chap stick before putting my jacket on. Of course, not my own jacket, but one out of Alice's closet. It's a grey jacket with black buttons. I already love it.

_It smells so good.. Like Alice.._

"Ready?" Alice's asks.

I look at myself in the mirror and see myself blushing. A nervous chill runs through my veins and I look myself in the eyes.

_Seriously, what could happen with Alice? It's just a normal day of shopping. Like we always do.._

With those words echoing in my mind I turn to face Alice and nod at her.

"Let's go shopping!" I say sarcastically, smirking at her.

We both walk to the bedroom door and I accidentally bump into her when all of a sudden she stops in the doorway. Without saying anything she stares into my eyes, and I can only stare back. Then, she turns around and continues walking.

_Why did she do that?_

Quickly she walks downstairs, through the house, then outside to her car. I get in the passengers seat and put my seatbelt on.

_Ready for another day with Alice.._


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi guys. I wrote this new chapter as quick as I could. I won't be having a lot of time soon, since I'll be moving out to Scotland, but I will definitely keep on writing for this story. I really hope you like this chapter, and of course I'm curious to hear what you think!**

**x IertjeAshfan**

**The song Alice is singing inside her head is by Paramore, I caught myself.**

* * *

**BPOV**

After hours of walking around in clothing shops I seriously don't see how it can still be interesting for Alice. She doesn't skip any shop, and I don't know how long I can keep on walking after her.

"Alice.." I start.

"Yes, Bella?" Alice doesn't look up to face me, but keeps on going through some skirts on a shelf.

"I'm kind of.. tired. And a little hungry. I do eat, remember.."

Alice looks up at me now and smiles at me, looking apologetic.

"Oh. I'm so sorry Bella. You know how I am when I see new clothes within my reach. I just feel like running around and grabbing as much as I can." Alice winks at me.

I laugh and reach out my hand to hold onto her arm for a second.

_Hmm.. soft.. cold skin.._"

I know you better than you think, Alice, it's okay. But can we just get something to eat soon? I think my stomach will come out and look for food itself, that is if I don't get it quick."

She nods, smiling a big smile and we walk out of the shop, in search of food.  
We pass a lot of fast food restaurants but I really don't feel like that today. Once we find a small cafe I nod approvingly at Alice, and she does the same at the exact same time. I start to blush and giggle. Inside the cafe there aren't a lot of people. A few older women in the corner, two men at the bar and us. We walk to a table in front of the window and sit down, Alice sitting in the shade, facing me from across the table. I smile at her and quickly grab the menu. When the waitress stands next to our table, greeting us, Alice orders for me.

_Of course she knows what I wanted to order.._

"Not fair!" I say, playfully.

"I know, but it's so easy.." Alice winks at me.

I stare into her eyes and she stares back, making me flush. Quickly I look out the window and see a woman, walking past with a small dog on a leash, following her, or more being dragged..

"Here is your yoghurt and fresh fruit salad, enjoy."

Before I can thank the waitress, she's already gone. Instead I pick up a spoon full of yoghurt and bring it to my mouth quickly.

"It really doesn't look appetizing at all," Alice says, looking a little disgusted.

"Well, it's doesn't taste amazingly, but it's just something I'm used to eating." I smile sweetly before putting another spoon full inside my mouth.

"Yum," I say, teasing Alice a that I grab a few cherries and chew on them slowly.

Alice keeps looking at me while I eat, causing me to blush a bright red colour.

"Want to try a strawberry?" I ask, teasingly, holding one in front of her face.

Alice keeps staring at me with a smirk on her face, then leans in and slowly takes a small bite of the red fruit in my hands.

_Wow. The way her lips close around the strawberry is the most erotic view ever.._

Even though she tries to hide her disgust, I see her nose wrinkle and her lips pout a little.

"Hmm.. tastes.. nice.." she manages to both laugh loudly and I start eating the remaining yoghurt and fruit on my plate. I can feel Alice's eyes burning on my forehead, but look down at my plate.

_What is she looking at?_"Oh, Bella. I've seen the most perfect dress for you, and I know we'll find it this afternoon!" Alice cheers, almost bouncing up and down in her seat. I know she tries to stay calm, just clapping her hands together softly.

"Can you walk one more hour? Oh please, Bella. I know it's going to look so good on you! ..Edward will love it! I'm sure!"

I sigh and look up at her perfect face again.

_Edward will always say that I look perfect in something, whatever it is.._

"Sure. I trust you," I say, staring deeply in her eyes.

"Great," Alice cheers and gets up from her seat.

"Let's go! I'll pay!"

_Alice and her shopping-addiction. Will I ever get used to it? Surely not.._

...

"Here it is! Here it is!" Alice cheers, pointing at a dress in the window of a luxurious clothing shop.

With one look at the dress I know for sure that this is going to be really expensive. I'm sure I can't even pay for this..

"Let's go inside!" Alice takes my arm and pulls me inside, smiling from ear to ear. While I try to walk slowly and look around for a moment, Alice immediately walks towards the rack of dresses in the back of the shop.

"Bella, here! It's this one here!" Alice holds up a dress for me to see.

It looks beautiful. A crimson red, silk dress, knee length, with black lace around the edges. I walk closer to Alice and stand next to her, already admiring the dress she's holding.

"Don't you love it, Bella? I know it's so perfect for you!"

Alice looks at me.

_I'm sure she's wondering what I'm thinking right now._"You've already seen me wearing it, so I might as well try it on," I wink at Alice.

We walk to the fitting rooms and I close the swinging door behind me, Alice waiting outside for me. It takes only a short moment to change into the dress. For a second I stand there, looking at myself in the mirror. This dress is really gorgeous. When I walk out of the fitting room Alice is looking at me, proud and smiling brightly.

"Done deal!" Alice cheers, leaning against the wall.

I smile at her and then start searching for the price tag. Before I can find it I feel a short tug at my back and hear a tag being ripped off.

"No need for knowing the price, Bella. I'm buying it for you. It's my gift to you."

She grins and turns me around to face the fitting room again.

"Go change into your own clothes, so I can take the dress and pay for it."

Alice turns around and I take a step forward into the fitting room. Before I can hold on to something I trip over my own shoes and fall forward in the small space, hitting my head against a mirror and I can hear it smash into pieces. A sharp pain stings in my arm and I can see shards of the mirror sticking out.

"Bella! What's going on?!" Alice shouts from outside the room. The door is closed behind me so she can't see me.

"Alice! I think you better stay outside!"

_Shit.. this can't be happening..  
_

* * *

**APOV**

Before I can think to react, the smell of warm blood fills my nose.

_Oh no, my vision.. The blood, resisting.. accident.._I feel it burning in my throat, Bella's blood smells stronger than any human I've ever smelled. Not at all unpleasant..

_Alice, this is Bella! You have to stop thinking like that and help her! NOW!_My hunger feels unbearable and I clench my fists while trying to resist sucking her dry. The other part inside me fights to be strong for Bella. I need to know what is wrong, and I need to know it now.  
I open the swinging door and see Bella lying on the floor, one hand pressed against her face and the other hand holding onto her arm. Blood drips from under her hands, down her cheek and arm.

"Alice, it's okay. You can let someone else help me."

Bella looks up at me and I feel some kind of pain in my chest, knowing that she might be scared of me, thinking of me wanting to drink her blood. Quickly I kneel down next to her and take her hands away from the cuts.

_She smells so good.. she looks so.. scared, in pain.._

I cup her face in my right hand and hold onto her bleeding arm with my left.

"It's okay, Bella. I'm not going to hurt you," I sigh, hoping she believes me.

Her eyes are pooling with tears and underneath the blood her cheeks turn a bright red.

"Bella, it's going to be ok. I'm here. I'm going to get you home to Carlisle and before you know it you'll be all right again."

Bella looks straight into my eyes and I feel a shiver go down my spine.

_What is she thinking..?_

For the shortest second Bella leans closer to me, not taking her eyes away from mine. Her lips are so close to mine, I feel her breath against my lips.

"Alice.." Bella sighs.

_Yes..?_

My mind goes blank and I feel Bella's bottom lip grace against mine. Then, cold again. Bella is sitting up against the wall, staring at her hands that are covered in blood.

_Did I just imagine it all? Am I going crazy!?_

Not knowing what is going on, I quickly grab my phone from my purse and dial Emmett's number. After telling what happened I tell him goodbye again and look back at Bella. Her eyes are searching across my face, for I don't know what.

_Did Bella really kiss me..?_

"Emmett is coming to pick us up. He's almost here."

Bella nods at me, still staring at me, her face flushed. I get up and peek outside the fitting room. No one is looking, the shopkeeper is talking to someone on the phone.

"Let me help you out of this dress. Otherwise they might think we want to steal it.." I hold out my hand and Bella grabs it quickly.

I see the cuts are hurting her, she flinches but tries to hide her pain. Slowly I remove the dress from her shaking body and help her put on her own clothes. Bella sits down on a chair in the little hallway and I run to the counter to pay for the ripped dress, and a new one. Before the man can ask me any questions I throw the money on the counter and run back to Bella, who's sitting there, staring at me again.

"Let's go."

I'm supporting Bella outside and see Emmett standing next to his car. His eyes grow bigger once he sees the blood that is covering Bella's cheek and arm, and his yaw drops seeing the blood on my hands. Quickly he walks towards us and holds onto Bella's other arm.

"Are you two okay?" Emmett asks.

Emmett looks at me and knows I didn't hurt her.

_I could never hurt Bella.._

Bella sits down in the back of the car, and I sit down next to her, holding her close to me. Emmett drives faster than he normally does, and we reach the house within a few course Edward is standing outside, waiting for us. He must have heard my thoughts as we drove closer to the house. Before the car is fully stopped Edward is standing next to it already and opens the door on Bella's side.

"Bella, love! Are you ok!?" His eyes flash in anger towards me.

_"I thought she was going to be safe with you!"_

I shiver hearing his angry voice in my mind, but keep calm.

_"Bella tripped, it's nothing serious, Edward. You know how she is, and I am only human for that part. Can't stare at her every step.."_

Edward looks back at Bella, who is looking sadly at me.

"Carlisle will help you Bella, and I'm sure Edward is happy to take care of you from here."

Bella gives me a little smile and looks at Edward. She steps out of the car and Edward supports her towards Carlisle's office, inside the house.

_I could have done.. YOU'RE PUSHING AND PULLING ME DOWN TO.._

I give myself a mental smack on the head and walk inside with Emmett.

"I'm proud of you, sister!" he grins, hugging me with one arm while we walk. "She really does smell good, and she's lucky that you were there with her, and not some other vampire.."

_If he only knew about my inside struggle._

I nod and smile back at him, punching him against his arm.

"You know me. I might not even be a real vampire when it comes to blood sucking." I wink at him and he laughs, loudly.

Once inside I run up to my room and lock the door behind me, not that it would really matter. I look at the blood on my fingers and inhale deeply.

_You know you want to try it, just try it, nothing harmful about this.._

Another smack. I need to stop thinking those things while Edward is so close, just a few rooms away, with Bella..  
I block my mind and open my diary. Time to do some serious writing.


	8. Chapter 8

**BPOV**

_Why did Edward look so angry at Alice. She didn't even do anything? She just bought me the most expensive dress there is and brought me home without difficulty about the blood.._

"Are you okay, Bella? You look so terrible, it must hurt so badly.."

I look up at Edward and see his worried eyes stare into mine.

"I'm fine actually, Alice acted really quickly to help me and brought me back fast, with Emmett of course," I answer, sounding a bit irritated.

Edward frowns hearing my tone and nods his head.

"Well, I expected you to come home safely without injuries.."

_What is his problem!? I am fine, I'm still walking and talking, nothing serious.._

"You know I always get myself in trouble. Nothing to blame Alice for.."

We walk through the hallway in silence. I'm still holding onto Edwards arm for support when I suddenly remember my actions of this afternoon.

_Did I seriously kiss Alice? What was I thinking! Well, I know the answer to that.. I just wanted her to know I'm not at all afraid of her, anything but.. I just needed her so bad.._

I feel my face flush and Edward doesn't show that he sees. We reach Carlisle's office within seconds and enter the big room. Inside it smells like a mix-up of library and hospital. In a big armchair next to the window I see Carlisle sitting, reading a book. When we stand close to him he looks up at Edward, then at me, and smiles friendly.

"Bella. Did you trip to get away from Alice's shopping addiction? I'm sure she would have understood if you told her." Carlisle keeps smiling and winks at me.

I get more and more crabby listening to people making jokes about Alice when she did nothing wrong. It was a perfect day.. __

"No, not at all. It was so nice today. Just me being clumsy again.. like always."

I have a little difficulty staying friendly towards Carlisle. I know he was only joking.

"Let's get started on cleaning your face and arms, Bella. You'll be clean and stitched up in a few minutes." Carlisle pats my hand a few times and then walks to his cupboard, searching for his medical instruments.

"Edward, can you get me a warm washing cloth and a dry towel, please."

Carlisle looks back at Edward, who leaves the room within seconds.

"So, Bella, are you staying here with us tonight? It's our family movie night, which I find really amusing. Of course you are invited, since you are part of our family to."

His fatherly tone is filled with kindness and love. Charlie isn't like that at all, even though I know he loves me so much. And of course he's always there for me. We're just not the kind of family that does those things together.

"Of course, Carlisle. I'd love to stay. No school tomorrow anyway." I smile at him as he finishes the stitches.

"There, all closed up again and ready to start healing. Edward has a washing cloth for you so you can clean your face a bit. I'm proud of Alice."

I nod and feel much better now.

"Thank you, so much, Carlisle."

_At least he appreciates what Alice has done for me today._

Edward is standing next to me with the towel and cloth and I quickly grab the cloth and press it to my face.

_If only Alice was here to stare into my eyes while she cleans my face.._

I wipe all the blood off my face and the remaining blood on my arms and hands. Edward still stands next to me and looks at me every move.

"Can I change clothes first, before movie night?"

I'm sure it's fine, I just feel the need to ask everything.

"Yes, of course. Anything I need to get for you from Charlie's house?" Edward looks at me while waiting for my reply.

"I'll just look in our room first, surely I must have something lying around there. No need to run tonight." I answer.

Carefully I slide off the medical bed and press a kiss on Edward's cheek.

"Thank you for the towel and cloth, Edward. And thank you, Carlisle. Hope you don't get bored of stitching up your daughter-in-law." I wink at him and walk past Edward, leaving the room.  
Inside Edward's room it's chilly and I get undressed quickly. Now I only need to find some clothes for tonight. Maybe just pyjamas or something like that. When I reach for my bag next to Edward's bed I see clothes lying on his bed. Women clothes. A note lies on top.

_Here, Bella. You can wear this tonight, since all your clothes are in the washing machine._

x Alice

I pick up the clothes and hold them up in front of me. Blue and purple pyjamas, how did she know again.

_Does she really have visions about everything?_

I quickly put them on and touch the soft fabric with my fingers. Pulling the shirt up to my nose so I can smell it, a perfect smell of Alice fills my nose. With a sigh I drop the shirt again and look at my own face in the mirror on the wall. Looks like my face is a bright red all day long. Again I stroke the fabrics, around my hips, closing my eyes.

_Oh, Alice.._

With sadness I open my eyes again and take my perfume from my bag. I spray it all over the pyjamas so I smell like myself again instead of Alice. Maybe that will help clear my mind a little more, instead of dwell in my own fantasy world.  
When I walk down the staircase I see the whole family sitting down on the sofa's close to the television. I also see mountains of snacks on the table; popcorn, chocolates, different kinds of candy, ice cream, you name it and it's there.

"We didn't want you to get hungry, and also we didn't really know what you would like tonight, so we took it all." Esme smiles friendly when I walk into the living area.

"And now we can be sure as well that you'll stay awake all night, with all the sugar," Jasper says, laughing at me and winking.

_More time to look at Alice.._

I give myself a mental slap and focus on Edward. There's a space for me next to him on the sofa. He smiles sweetly when I sit down next to him and he pulls me closer in his arms.

"Why, Bella. You smell delicious tonight. New perfume?" Edward asks me. While pressing his nose in my hair.

_Just a mix of my perfume and Alice's perfect smell.._

"No, it's just my own perfume that I've had for ages now. Thanks anyway," I whisper softly in his ear, even though I'm sure they can all hear it.

I reach out for a big chocolate bar on the table and open the wrapper. I bite off a big piece and chew on it slowly.

"Shall we start with our first film then?" Carlisle asks and puts a DVD in the player.

I wonder what film we are going to watch. When it starts I see the title "The Ring" and I sigh. I've seen this one before, and I'm sure they have to, but before it always sent shivers down my spine watching it. Now, being surrounded by stranger things, I don't get scared that easily anymore.  
The film is almost finished and everyone is still watching with high concentration, or at least, that's what I think when I look at their faces. My eyes stop when they have reached Alice's face. It's good that everyone is so focussed on the screen so I can just do whatever I like.

_Or so I thought_

Alice looks up at me and meets my eyes.

**APOV**

I look at Bella and see her staring into my eyes.

_How long has she been staring at me..?_

All of a sudden a vision hits me. Not flashes, like before, but a full one. Bella notices my change of expression and looks away quickly. She probably thinks it's her that I'm acting like this. I close my eyes and focus on my vision.

_Bella is somewhere I haven't seen before. A small house in the woods. Far east from our house. Not even Forks. There's a river close by. It's raining. Bella is alone. Sitting behind a sofa, crying. On the coffee table are letters. A diary on Bella's lap. She's writing in it._

It feels like I'm intruding her privacy but my visions are almost always seriously needed.. I close my eyes again and focus to get my vision to the things she's writing.

_Bella's hand moves the pen over the paper, writing everything down;_

Alice, I could not stay. This is more than I can handle and I hope you understand. I'm betraying the whole family, but mostly myself. Edward can't know. Promise me, Alice. You've always been the best sister I could ever wish for, so promise me that you will destroy this letter after you've read it, and just let me do this alone. I hate myself for this, and it hurts me terribly to have to write you this and not see you in person, but you understand.

I'm in love, Alice. I can't be with Edward anymore, nor anyone else. I'm in love. . . With you.

Bella rips the paper out and puts it next to her on the floor. She starts over on a new sheet of paper, finding the last ten ones not good enough..

I open my eyes again. Shock, panic hits me. Everyone but Bella looks up at me, wondering what's wrong.

_How can this be.. It can't, can it?_

"Oh, no! I put my white blouse in the pink wash! I have to get it out quickly!"

I make something up so no one will be suspicious, and run to my room as fast as possible. There I sit down on my bed, shaking.

_Bella.. she loves me.. _

I'm not sure whether I should be terribly happy with this news, or upset because she's so miserable now, soon to leave this family to be somewhere alone..

How can I keep on blocking my mind from Edward, knowing this about his girl, the love of his life, the one that makes him truly happy. He can't know this. Not ever. This is the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

Before I walk downstairs I get a CD of mine off the desk and slowly walk into Edward's room, placing the CD in Bella's bag. It is the one that I saw lying on the table in my vision of Bella. She must have taken it from me if I wouldn't have known this now because of my vision.  
Then, I get back down and see my family waiting for me, watching trailers of the next DVD. Blocking my mind 24/7 isn't helping me while trying to enjoy movies like I normally do.. I sit down next to Jasper and look at the screen. From the other side I can feel Bella's eyes staring at me, but I ignore it and keep repeating the name of the movie in my head.

In the middle of the movie Bella gets up and walks to the bathroom.

"Sorry, humans do pee once in a while," she says, and Edward nods, smiling at her.

I smell the perfume that is sprayed all over the pyjamas I gave her.

_Doesn't she like the way I smell?_

I look at the film again and focus on that. There's a girl with red hair, swimming in a clear, blue ocean. It makes her hair sway around her face, looking even brighter red because of the water.

_She's beautiful, not like Bella though. Bella looks perfect under water. Chocolate brown hair dancing around her beautiful tan face. Her eyes shining bright, looking for mine.._

So, that is not helping. I start thinking of the previous film we watched and think of the horrible faces the dead people had in some scenes. Hmm..  
Bella returns to the room and sits down next to Edward again. He takes her hand and I suddenly feel jealous. Now that I know she does love me, I'm also very sure she kissed me today, and now she's sitting there, pretending to love my brother the same as she did before. She's holding his hand, not mine.  
Suddenly my hands tingle, wanting to reach out for her, take her in my arms, press my lips against hers, not like this afternoon, when it was nothing more than a light touch, no. I want to kiss her roughly yet sweetly. Show her that I do feel the same and don't think she's insane..

We watch more movies, Bella keeps eating, but we all can see that she won't stay awake much longer. Edward looks at Bella and notices it to. He whispers something in her ear and she nods, looking sad and tired. They get up and keep holding hands.

_Damn it.._

"Bella is tired, I'm taking her to bed." Edward looks at all of us and then back at Bella. We all nod and look friendly towards Bella. Then, we all wish her a good night and Edward takes Bella upstairs. We hear the door close behind them, upstairs, and we continue looking at the TV screen. Not that I'm still interested, but I don't have anything else to do now, and it's the safest at the moment to stay away from both Edward and Bella.

_If things were different I'd be there with Bella right now, telling her the truth.  
_


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm sorry that the last chapter wasn't perfect, also I found a mistake I made saying Bella's face is tan instead of pale, but I hope you like this chapter a lot better. I'm also glad that most of you liked the previous chapter, makes me want to write more and more!**

X IertjeAshfan

.:.

**BPOV**

I wake up in the middle of the night. My alarm clock says that it's 2.37am exactly. Way too early for me to get up. I concentrate on my surroundings and find that Edward isn't lying next to me on the bed. There's a piece of paper on his pillow. I pick it up and hold it up towards the window, trying to read it with the little moonlight.

My sweet Bella,

Don't worry, I'm out hunting. I will be back in the morning, hopefully before you've even read this.

Love,  
Edward

Oh well, out hunting again. I know it can't annoy me, but I just can't imagine how hard it can possibly be to be around me, a human. I don't think I smell different myself, but everyone in this house seems to notice. I feel like a walking hamburger sometimes.  
My throat is a little sore and I decide to get up for some water. I switch on the light and rub my eyes. It's pretty cold out of the bed, since no one is thinking of turning on the heating in this place. I look for some socks in my bag and put them on before walking into the hallway. Finally I didn't forget. I walk towards the bathroom and hear voices. There's someone taking a shower and soon I hear who that person is.

_Alice.._

My heart skips a beat and I wonder what I should do. I feel pulled towards the bathroom, wanting to walk in so badly, but the other side of me tells me to just go back to the bedroom. It's safer to go back to the bedroom, but I can't control myself. Silently I continue walking to the bathroom and when my hand is on the doorknob I wait. Alice isn't singing any more and I now hear only a male's voice coming from the radio. I already miss her sweet angelic voice.

"Who's there?" Alice asks, even though I'm pretty sure she already knows.

"It's me, Bella. I'm sorry. I just wanted some water.." I answer, finding it difficult to speak all of a sudden.

"Bella! Sure, come in."

I wait a little more, asking myself if I can really just walk in and be normal towards Alice after everything that happened during the day. Then, I turn the doorknob and open the door a little. Looking inside I see Alice still standing under the shower, but the shower cabin has stickers on it so it's not see-through any more. Alice's head is still visible above the sticker and she looks at me, smiling.

"You're up early," she says.

I nod shyly while I try not to think of Alice's naked body, so close, in the same space.

I walk to the sink and open the tap. The cold water on my hands wakes me up even more.

"Thank you, for the pyjamas by the way." I almost forgot that she gave hers for me to wear.

"No problem, of course. I'm sorry that I put all your clothes in the machine. You know how I am when it comes to clothes."

Again I nod and feel my face turn red.

"Did you manage to get your blouse out of the laundry in time?" I remember that she ran upstairs to save it.

Now it looks as if Alice is shy and turns her face down a little, but then looks up at me again and smiles again, but half-hearted.

"No, I threw it away, sadly enough."

Her voice sounds strange, and I feel bad for her. She must have liked it a lot.

"Can't we get a new one soon?" I suggest, trying to make her smile again. It works only a little.

"I hope so, Bella. I would love to go shopping again with you.."

"But..?" I hear there's more, by the way her voice sounds.

"Nothing. I'm sure we can do that soon. You should drink something and go back to bed, Bella."

I feel strange after hearing her voice sound so low and different. I take a few sips of water and then look at her once more. A small shiver goes down my spine looking at her lips and perfect golden eyes. They seem to be brighter now, looking at me, strangely intense.  
I'm scared to keep talking so I decide to go back to bed, like she told me to do.

"Night.." I whisper.

"Hmm.." she murmurs back, so I turn my back to her and leave the bathroom quickly. 

_Why does she act like this?_

Back in bed I lie awake and stare at the ceiling. I feel like I'm falling deeper and deeper every day, every minute, every time I breathe air into my lungs. My heart is screaming for more of Alice. More of us.  
I close my eyes and let my hand slide under the sheets. Thank god that Edward isn't here to see my red, glowing face as I fantasize about Alice.

_Oh, Alice._

**APOV**

I sigh as if I really feel the need to breathe. Warm water drips down on me while I stare at my feet. This situation can't be real. This is not really happening. If only I could say that with it being the truth. Bella is filling up my whole being and now I have to block out my own brother, making sure he doesn't get to know about all this. How did it change? Why did this happen? My feelings for Bella are growing still and I can't seem to stop it. Honestly I don't even want to stop it..  
I turn off the shower and wrap my towel around me. The mirror shows my sad face and I find it hard to look at myself.

_When did I become such a good liar? Why am I lying to myself? To Bella.._

Within seconds I'm all dry and I cross the hallway quicker than ever. In my room I lock the door behind me and lean against it. I sink down onto the ground and hold my head in my hands. My eyes burn, but there are no tears following. I want to cry, so loud. I want real, wet tears streaming down my cheeks, I want Bella to hold me. Now. Another sigh. Being a vampire never felt as bad as it does now.

I get up from the floor and walk to my closet for clean clothes. Once I have them on I decide to go downstairs and maybe read a book or two to get my mind on other things. Downstairs I find I'm not alone. Esme is sitting at the breakfast bar and looks up when I enter the room. She smiles but when she sees my sad face her smiles drops again, immediately.

"Alice, what is wrong, my dear? I have never seen you this sad.."

Should I tell her. Can I trust this with her? Yes. This is my mother. She has always been there for anything and everything. But everyone in this house would hear it to..

I take a piece of paper from a close lying notebook and a pen and start writing things down. Every single thing. About everything that has happened so far between Bella and me, the beach, the shopping, my vision, the bathroom. It takes me no longer than half a minute and Esme is standing next to me now. She takes the paper from my hands when I reach to give it to her, and then hide my face in my hands. I sink down onto the floor again with my back against the kitchen cupboards and keep my face hidden. I only hear Esme handling the paper, the silence that follows, and quiet "oh's" and more sounds that I can decipher in my mind. She must think I'm ready for another mental institution.

"Alice. Are you sure about that vision? Are you.. sure about everything you.. wrote down?"

I look up and nod. If only I could cry now. Esme looks at me and kneels down next to me. She wraps her arms around me tightly and I close my eyes.

"Things can change, sweetheart. This can all change and maybe it won't have to be like this at all. Bella could move out with Edward and be totally fine with him forever.."

At this I look into my mothers eyes with pure panic. She looks back, not understanding.

"I don't want that! At all. I don't want things to change that way!" My voice sounds higher than normal.

She nods and I take the piece of paper back. I write only a few words this time. Enough to explain everything I want to scream out right now. Esme looks with me on the paper as the ink comes down onto the paper.

_I love her.._

We don't speak for a long while, just sit in silence.

"Alice. I hope you are really sure about things like this. I can't help you with this, nor _her_. If your vision is the future then you'll have to accept it and find a way to solve things. For _all_ of you.."

I nod and look into her eyes. Esme smiles slightly and I still feel like crying.

_I want Bella.. I can't be without her.._

We both get up when my dad walks into the room. He looks at the both of us curiously, but when Esme gives him a meaningful look back he smiles and greets us. I greet him back and walk out of the kitchen, towards the living room.  
I take one of my favourite books and sit down on a chair next to the window. It's raining outside, still dark as well. I would be so much easier if I could sleep like a normal human being. Instead, I open my book and start reading. 

**BPOV**

After hours of rolling through the bed from one side to the other, light is coming through the curtains. Great. Half a night without sleep. I must look horrible now with dark circles under my heavy-feeling eyes. Edward isn't back yet so I get up alone. Not bothering to shower, I walk to the washing machine and find my clothes perfectly folded on top of it.

_Thank you, Alice._

I take my clothes and walk back to the bedroom. Quickly I look outside and see that the weather is grey and wet, again. Edward must be soaked when he comes back. I put on some warm clothes and turn on the radio. Morning news is on an I don't really listen to what they are saying. Instead I look in a mirror on the wall and stare into my own eyes. Another long day, just starting. How am I going to survive another day?  
I remember Alice in the shower last night, talking about her blouse. Maybe it would be nice to take her to one of her favourite shops and buy her a new one.. Maybe she forgot about it because we had such a weird day together. That maybe she was thinking I'm insane and about plans to get away from me.. No. Surely Alice doesn't think of me that way. Before I can think more, Alice is standing in the doorway, smiling brightly.

"Oh, Bella! How nice! Don't you mind shopping in the rain? Of course we take umbrella's!"

She must have seen already that I'm taking her to the shops then. Oh well.

"Sure. Anything to make you smile again," I answer.

At this she looks to the ground for a short moment and then back again, smiling that half-hearted smile again. Or maybe I'm just imagining that..  
Right at this moment Edward is back in the room. He looks at me, then at Alice, and walks towards me, kissing my cheek. Again, I see Alice looking away. Does it make her uncomfortable seeing other people kiss? I never noticed that before.

"We're going shopping today, Edward. I promised your sister to get her a new blouse."

Edward looks at me, less happy than a few seconds ago.

"But we never do anything together any more.. When are we going to have some time together again? I miss you, more than you think.." he says, making me feel a little bad.

"Tomorrow. I'm all yours tomorrow. Is that okay?"

He looks at me thoughtfully, then nods and smiles again.

"No injuries and danger this time, do you hear me?" Edward says to Alice, and me.

We both nod and I feel a little angry again, knowing it wasn't Alice's fault last time it went wrong. I turn on my heel and take Alice's hand, pulling her with me outside. I feel her stiff hand in mine and wonder what's wrong, until I remember that she is always like this. In a strange way it arouses me, thinking of her cold hands, her cold body, touching mine. When we are outside, close to the car, we both notice that we're still holding hands and we both let go, me turning a little red. We get in the car and I shiver. The seats and the air inside the car are cold. Alice sees me shivering and turns on the heating for me. I look at her, thankfully. Our eyes lock for a few seconds and then she turns her eyes away again.

"Let's go then," she says softly, almost whispering.

A small smile appears on my face as I look at the road in front of us. I know I shouldn't be doing this to myself, being so close with Alice, but it feels too good not to..

__

****


	10. Chapter 10

**Hi there! I want to apologize for the way my stories are looking sometimes. I downloaded OpenOffice to get rid of the Italic and Bold mistakes, but they are still there, and it annoys me a lot. I can't seem to fix it. I hope you like reading my chapters anyway, and I still enjoy** **writing it for sure. Thanks for the reviews, keep them coming! Here is my new chapter.  
Enjoy!**

X IertjeAshfan

APOV

I try to keep my eyes on the road, not focussing on Bella. Edward seems pretty annoyed about me stealing Bella all the time, but this time it wasn't even my fault. Bella wanted to go herself, and of course I know why..  
I shouldn't even go away with her alone, make this so much worse, for the both of us, but I just can't ignore her, especially not all of a sudden. She can't notice that I know about her feelings. If I'd act strange now, she would know it for sure. So all I can do now is just go with it and see how things go. If only I knew what was going to happen, but Bella doesn't even know it herself, so that leaves me clueless as well. I sigh heavily and feel that Bella is staring at me from the side. Her eyes burn my cheek and it's so hard to not stare back. I just can't tell her. I can't do that to Edward. She is meant to be with him, not me..

At the shops I park the car and we get out.

"Where are we going first?" I ask.

Bella looks at me and smiles.

"Every shop that sells blouses.." she answers, and winks.

_Bella is so cute. She doesn't even know it herself.._

At that I have to smile back at her and walk closely to her down the street. To strangers we must look like best friends. A bit scared of her reaction, I take Bella's arm and hold onto it. Bella doesn't pull away but smiles at me and we keep on walking until we reach the shops that we are looking for. We enter several shops but don't find anything. Well, we don't buy anything because I don't want to be done shopping. If it was up to me we'd be walking together like this for hundreds of days to come..  
In one of the shops we search through piles of jeans when all of a sudden I hear a weird sound coming from Bella.

"What was that?" I ask her, frowning at her.

Bella's face turns bright red and she stares at her feet, then back at me.

"I think I forgot to have breakfast.."

I giggle loudly and smack myself on the forehead. How could I have forgotten about the fact that she still needs to eat and do other human things to stay alive.

"Of course, and I should have remembered to take some breakfast with me for if you get hungry.."

I take her hand in mine and press it for a short second. Then I pull her with me out of the shop to go look for food.

…

"Thanks for paying, Alice," Bella says, and smiles sweetly at me.

If only I could be closer to her now. Stand with our chests pressed together, so I could lean in and touch her lips with my own.. I shake my head with embarrassment and annoyance. I should really stop now with all these mad thoughts and fantasies. I should just convince her that she and Edward must leave to live on their own somewhere far away, so they can be happy together, without me. The thought alone stings somewhere inside me. The place where my heart used to beat, but is still now, aching to beat once more. Maybe Bella will listen to me and follow my advice and find out that she is really meant to be with Edward.

"Are you okay, Alice?"

I am so lost in thoughts that I didn't notice earlier that Bella and I are still standing outside a café, and Bella has been shaking my arm for a few moments now.

"Yes, sure. Totally okay."

Okay maybe I exaggerated, but I can't make her worry.

"Let's start shopping again," Bella pulls my arm and we walk through the busy streets, looking for my imaginary blouse.

After a long morning and half of the afternoon we enter the last shop, sadly enough. We already found a blouse for me, so the shopping is just for fun now. Bella had been watching me try on so many different shirts and dresses today, and still she seemed as happy as ever. I wish I felt the same right now.

"Look, isn't this a perfect shirt for me?" Bella asks, waiting for my answer.

She holds out a cute blue and black shirt and immediately I can imagine her having it on, and me.. taking it off again.. I turn my face away quickly, acting as if I get distracted by someone else walking passed.

"Yes, you should definitely get it," I answer, trying to control my voice, not sounding shy.

"Are you sure you're okay, Alice. You sound so different today.."

I turn to face her again and smile the best smile I have.

Bella makes a move to open her wallet but then she drops it and everything that was inside now lies on the floor. A lot of coins, receipts and small papers and also a photo of me and Bella together. It was made on her birthday, I can remember it well. I never thought she kept it in there.  
Bella mumbles a few words of embarrassment and starts collecting her things again from the shop floor. I get on my knees as well and help her quickly. Within a few seconds we are standing again with everything as it was. Bella's face looks like it's turned red permanently, and I'm sure if I was still human, my face would have looked the same. We remain quiet while Bella pays for the shirt, and I walk towards the door.  
I wonder how long this can go on. How long until Edward finds out. How long until Bella is going to snap and disappear? I decide that it can't be like this much longer. Things will have to change..

We walk to the car, still silent, and when we've reached it we get inside. Bella smiles at me but when she sees my face her smile drops a little.

"Alice, you know you can tell me, whatever is on your mind."

I keep staring out of the front window but start talking, almost whispering.

"Bella, I've noticed that you act different.. towards Edward. I just wondered if everything was okay between you two.."

Inside I'm strangling myself for lying so bad to Bella. Of course I already know what's going on.

"Really..?" Bella whispers back, looking to her side now, away from me.

"Yes.. and I'm just worried because I can't be without you.. my sister in law.. You are the best friend I've ever had. I can't bare the idea of having to be without you, even for the shortest amount of time."

At this Bella's face totally drops and her smile is nowhere to be found. I can even see her eyes glistening with tears that welled up quicker than ever.

"You and Edward, I never knew things could be so perfect between two people. I envy you. I wish I could love someone like that and know that it is meant to be, just like you two.."

The last part made me shiver with pain, emptiness taking over my body. Lying to Bella is the most painful thing I've ever done. It's just the right thing to do, to be fair towards Edward, our family and Bella..

"Meant to be.." Bella whispers softly, I can hear her voice strained with pain and tears.

"Alice, can you please take me home, now." Bella says, louder now.

She sits up in her seat and keeps looking out of her window.

"Of course. Edward will be happy to have you back in his arms.."

"No. Take me home. My house. My own home where Charlie is."

Bella's voice sounds harsh and I feel panic rise in my body. She must realize that she has to work things out with Edward. She has to be alone and see things clearly. Oh god, surely this isn't the moment before what I've seen in my vision, is it? I can do nothing else but drive Bella back to Charlie's house and wait if she's going to say more to me or not.  
When we arrive she opens the door quickly without words of goodbye, and slams it shut behind her. She doesn't look back and I sit in the car, still, with panic and fear taking over all of me. Edward must be able to read my thoughts now, and hell awaits me, surely, at home. As long as he doesn't know about what I've seen in my vision..

**BPOV**

My eyes let go of the tears that I was holding back in the car, as soon as I slam the car door shut behind me. I can't believe that I just left Alice like that, but this is too hard for me to do. I can't take more of any of this. Any of these feelings, for Alice, nor Edward. And now that I'm sure that Alice doesn't want me the way I want her, I can't even be bothered to face Edward today. Maybe not even tomorrow. How could I explain all my tears and struggles to Edward? I can't go to him telling him that I have a crush.. no.. I'm in love with Alice. For all this time.. And now Edward surely knows about my change of feelings because of Alice, and he'll come by my house soon.  
I have to leave now. I don't want to see him. I don't want to see anyone. I'm sure Edward will wait for the full story when Alice is back, so that gives me a few minutes time. I feel weird and scared, running from the people I love, because maybe now I love one of them too much..

I pull all my things out of the closets and then rush into the bathroom for some essentials. While quickly going through my bag to see if I have everything I see Alice's CD. I still have it, stolen now. I let my fingers run over the case for a second, then throw it back in my bag. I will take it with me. I take some money out of a drawer and close my bag. I have not much time left. Where could I possibly go so they can't find me? I try to think quickly, then pick up my phone and dial Jacobs number. He'll know something. He always knows something.  
The phone rings 2 times before Jacob answers.

"Bells! How nice of you to call! How are you!"

His voice sounds so carefree and happy. If only I could talk to him longer, it will have to wait. Until.. I don't know when I'll talk to him again..

"Jacob, please help me. I need to get away right now. I need to go somewhere where the Cullen's can't find me. I can't explain right now, I have to leave as soon as possible. Please tell me you know somewhere.."

There's a silence on the other side of the line for a short moment.

"Jake! Please, hurry.."

Finally he speaks again.

"You can go to an old fishers cabin in the woods. Close to a river. My dad and yours used to go there all the time. But now they find it too far and stay close. It might be awful there, no one has been there for years.."

I don't care at the moment and just accept whatever I get. I tell Jake it's fine and he gives me the directions so I can drive there. I have to remember that a key is hidden somewhere under a flowerpot.

"Oh, and Jake, please.. don't tell any of them where I am. Just make up anything, but don't tell them, not one of them.."

"Sure Bells.. are you sure I don't need to come and make sure you're okay, or go with you?"

He always tries to make me feel better, but right now, nothing works.

"No, thank you Jake. You are the best. I'll let you know more soon, I promise," and with that I hang up.

Within seconds I have written a small note saying I'm on a small weekend break, or whatever it might be, and that Jake knows where I am, for Charlie. I'm sure he'll know I'll be fine. I pick up my bag and run to my truck. It's waiting like a safe haven and I climb in to start my escape. 


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Dear readers, I am so sorry for waiting so long to update. I just got writers block or something, and along with that a lot of other ideas for stories, that are with a whole different storyline and characters. So here is my new chapter for this story, sorry that it's not as long as usual, I hope you are still following it and liking it, and I am still interested in reviews of course. Next chapter will finally hold some love between Alice and Bella. Thanks so much for reading!

X IertjeAshfan****

APOV

Edward is standing outside the house, waiting for me, eyes black as coals. And this time I can't even be upset with him, since I totally deserve it. I hope he won't make it too bad for me. I hope he doesn't know the real reason why Bella isn't here with me.

_Damn.._

"Alice!" Edward doesn't even wait for me to get out of the car. He's next to the door of the car in the blink of an eye and opens it with anger.

"Where is Bella? What have you done to her, I swear if you have hurt her..!"

I quickly slide out of the other side of the car and stay in control of my temper. It's not even all my fault. It is Bella's choice after all, and I even tried to do the right thing and make her think that I don't want her at all. I told her to realize that what she and Edward have is special, even though I already know it's going to end, probably soon. Maybe that part is my fault..

"Edward, it is not my fault that she's not here right now. She asked me to take her home, and I did. Did you want me to force her to come here?" 

Edward knows there's something more going on. Of course he must suspect something more because I've been blocking my mind and visions ever since these feelings started to creep into my system.

"Alice, this is no time for lies, no time for your cheerfulness! Tell me the truth, now! I have a right to know what is going on with my Bella!"

_She is not your Bella any more, Edward! She is mine, and I can't believe I told her to stay with you, you ass hole. It's your own fucking fault._

"Edward, let us go inside and talk about it. Bella is fine and there is not much to worry about." I try to make the situation sound less bad, but inside I know this is the worst case happening right now, and if I had a heartbeat I'm sure it would betray me in this moment.

"No, I don't need to go inside. I'll go and find Bella myself and talk to her, if you don't mind. She will tell me the truth, I'm sure."

Panic shoots through my body and I grab Edwards wrists before he can run off. I fear of what she'll say to him, if he even finds her..

"Alice! God damn it, what are you hiding. You're not so good at blocking thoughts when you're in panic!"

I give myself a mental slap and realize I just forgot to block these ones out as well.

"Edward, let's go inside, now."

"No, you can tell me right here, or let me go and I'll find out from Bella myself!"

"You won't find her.." I say, panic clearly in my voice. Edward is much faster than I am, and without a doubt he will find her sooner than I can. This is unfair.

Seeing no way out I blur out the first thing that comes to my mind.

"She's not yours any more. She hasn't been for a long time, and I know it for sure." 

Edward looks at me, bewildered and shocked.

"What are you talking about, Alice.. tell me now."

"She doesn't love you the way she loves.." I whisper and his eyes turn black in an instant.

"Alice, you are insane! Bella doesn't love you! She might like you for being such a nice sister, even though I start to doubt that now, but what you are saying is impossible!" His words sound harsh but there's a little doubt hiding in it.

"Bella is mine, accept it and tell me where she is!" he shouts at me and my anger is starting to show itself.

_Where is Jasper when you need mood control?_

"No, she is not! She wants me, she loves me!" I scream back at him. "I have seen it, in many visions, and I'm always right! You can't prove me wrong since I've seen Bella in my visions, writing me that she couldn't stay with us any more, because she did not love you the same as before. She loves me!" I think about my visions and he reads all of it. His face shows only hate and betrayal.

"Alice, you are making this up! You did something to make her leave me and you are going to pay for it!"

Edward is before me in a second and his fingers are wrapped tightly around my neck. I never needed to breathe anyway, but it's not very comfortable.

"Edward, she won't change her mind, and you killing me will not change things either.." I try to say, finding it hard to speak while being choked. His fingers loosen en I take advantage of the moment. I turn things around and clamp my legs around his middle on his back, and wrap my arm around his neck.

_If he thinks he can win this fight from me, he is definitely wrong!_

Edward growls and tries everything to get loose, but there's no chance I will let him choke me again.

"Edward, snap out of it. You have to realize that I didn't do anything to her, she changed her mind, all by herself, and you know my visions are true. I can't stop them, and actually.. I don't want to stop them. I need Bella, too."

Edward's eyes stay black as coal and he hisses things I can't and don't want to hear. She deserves much more than what he is giving her..

"Alice! How dare you think that! Bella has been for me, from the first moment we met. Nothing is going to change that!"

A cold rush flows across our bodies as Carlisle and Emmett are standing on each side of us, pulling our bodies apart. Carlisle's arms around my body and Emmett's around Edward.

"Stop this right now. Whatever it is, we can talk about it like always." Carlisle's voice makes me shiver and I stare down at my feet. If only he was right..

"Let's take this inside, shall we?" Carlisle and Emmett keep on holding us apart, while dragging us inside. I can see that Emmett is obviously struggling with Edward, but I already gave in to Carlisle. I don't even want to fight. I just want to run after Bella, wherever she is going..  
Edward growls at me and tries to get loose once more, without success.

"Alice, where is Bella?" Carlisle asks, sounding utterly calm. I keep staring down while his hands are still holding on to my arms strongly. He feels my mood is calmer now and when he lets go of me, I sink down to my knees, hands before my face.

"I don't know, Carlisle, Edward.. I don't know where she is. She asked me to bring her home, so I did, but I knew this day would come.." Now that I confessed this I feel even worse. I knew this would happen, and nobody else knew about it.

"Bella loves me.." I continue, sounding shocked and relieved at the same time. I can't believe I didn't act sooner, let her know sooner. How can I be so stupid!

Edward jumps out of Emmett's grasp and hits me against my jaw with breaking speed. I hear my face crack and look around me, dazed. Emmett runs towards him but Edward is gone before he can grab him. A vision hits me now and I wonder if I can really take this much pain right now.

_Edward.. running through the woods, smelling Bella..wanting to find her before me.._

No.. he can't reach her before me.. I have to find her..before he does..

I look at Carlisle who looks at me, concerned about my jaw, but I know he knows I need to go as well. Thank god that Carlisle does not take sides, even when I feel that the blame is on me completely. This is not just me. It is Bella mostly.

I run to the door and close it without looking back. If I have to fight for her, I will. I can't let go of what I'm feeling, and I can only hope she won't change her mind about this, too scared of the actual truth.

_Damn it.. if only I knew where she was.._

I feel as if I need to breathe while I run without stopping. I can't stop now. I let out a deep sigh. It feels wrong still. Something in my chest is killing me. Not even the stinging pain in my jaw can distract my focus from my chest. Before I know it I scream out loud, the loudest I can. I need Bella. I love her too. She loves me back. I can't let this pass. I run even faster and scream once more.  
After running for 5 hours I catch her smell. My vision hits me again, this time a little more detailed. She's at a brown cabin next to a small river. Jacobs cabin. Did she ask him for this? Is he in there with her? I don't see him in my vision. Her truck is outside the cabin, she must have driven like a mad person. Maybe she learned something from us after all..  
I wonder where Edward is. He could be with her already, or closer than I am. That idea makes me feel something like nauseousness and I ball up my fists in anger. He can't change her mind. She is mine!

I run and run until her smell is obviously around me in the air. Almost there, I'm sure of it. I need to see her, hold her, tell her I'm sorry a thousand times, and then a thousand times more. I should have told her before, not lied to her. If Edward is with her now, it's all my own fault if she chooses him over me. At least he is there with her, and I'm not. She would be deciding it on her own, without me changing her mind. He would know it was all her, not me being insane.

I stop running and feel my body coming to a halt. There it is. The red cabin with her truck next to it. The door isn't locked but closed shut. My fingers shake as I walk slowly towards it, being quiet just so I can hear if someone is inside. The only thing I can hear is loud sobs. Bella is inside. I wait another second, and then open the door slowly. My eyes adjust to the darkness inside and I take a quick look around. I can't see her but know where she is. My vision already showed me. On the table in front of me I see my CD and several attempts of letters to us, to me..

_Alice, _

_I could not stay. This is more than I can handle and I hope you understand. I'm betraying the whole family, but mostly myself. Edward can't know. Promise me, Alice. You've always been the best sister I could ever wish for, so promise me that you will destroy this letter after you've read it, and just let me do this alone. I hate myself for this, and it hurts me terribly to have to write you this and not see you in person, but you understand._

I'm in love, Alice. I can't be with Edward anymore, nor anyone else. I'm in love. . . With you.

I already read it in my vision, but now that I see it for real and touch the papers with my hand it feels even more intense. When I look over to the sofa I can see Bella's head behind it. Before I know what I'm doing I run towards her and pick her up in my arms, holding her tighter to me than I ever did before.

"Bella!" I say out loud, and press her even closer to me. I can hear her heartbeat racing now and her sobs are even louder now I'm holding her.

"Alice. What are you doing here? I don't want you to see me like this.."

_Oh Bella.._

__


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